A Transformational Maha Shivratri

Maha Shivratri (which is being celebrated this week) has always been one of the most significant festivals of the year for my family. We see it as a time for a new beginning, a time in which we ask for forgiveness and pledge ourselves to self-growth and self-development. And for me, these beliefs were strengthened last year, when I was able to personally feel rejuvenated from the energy and light of such a profound festival. 

It was in the midst of a difficult period in my life. I had lost the opportunity to become a leader in one of the organizations I had cherished throughout my student life. At the same time, I faced a series of confusing, depressing remarks by those I had looked up to with respect. I was also feeling disconnected from my dharma, a separation that made me question my path forward, and even, the purpose of my life. These different factors began to add up, weighing me down with sorrow and shame. 

While I was struggling to find my way through this mental fog, Maha Shivratri descended upon us. As the sun rose on that holiest of days, I felt empty, lost and distanced from everything I held dear and sacred. Almost out of habit, I began the traditional vrat, or intentional fast, that members of my family undertake with a small puja and a prayer to Bhagwan Shiva in the morning. Together with my grandparents, we began our main form of sadhana, going to a nearby mandir where we worshipped a Lingam, a representation of Bhagwan Shiva that embodies his formlessness as a pillar of light. Our worship was carried out through the acts of abhishek, bathing the moorti with milk and water, and pradakshina, circling it to remember Bhagwan Shiva’s presence at the center of our lives.

As the day of Maha Shivratri advanced, the clarity from fasting, the power of the prayer and rituals began to calm me and made me feel more enriched. A veil of peace had seemingly descended upon the chaos that had rocked my life in the preceding days, and I began to feel restored.

Shivratri puja usually goes through midnight, and as night began to fall, we converged again on the Shiva Mandir to engage in one of the most important rituals of Maha Shivratri – the Rudrabhishek Puja. This ritual is an expansion of the aforementioned abhishek ritual, where the moorti of Bhagwan Shiva is bathed and anointed with milk, honey, yogurt, ghee, and holy water. 

As I poured these liquids amidst the chanting of sacred mantras and shlokas, I felt a wave of energy wash over me. For so many days, my mind had been suppressed by the events of the recent past, events that had consumed and drained me of positivity. In that moment, it was almost as if I had been embraced by warmth and joy and received a divine blessing.  

I felt renewed. I had found myself again, in a way I had thought unimaginable just a few days before. As the rituals concluded, my mind was focused on the radiant Bhagwan Shiva, who had guided me from my sadness and into joy. My worship of Shiva as energy had itself given me renewed energy, purpose and meaning, making the festival even more special for me

Maha Shivratri now represents that resurgence of energy. A chance to prove to the world our own inner mettle and to find the strength that motivates us, that compels us to succeed and grow, while welcoming in warmth and positivity.

Om Namah Shivay!

Sagar Patel, is a high school student and a CoHNA youth volunteer.